Forgiveness For Good

     Some years ago a few Stanford professors entered into an exciting and very important project.  They, along with a good part of the world, realized the seriousness of the “ troubles” in the Northern six counties of Ireland.  The Catholics and the Protestants were deeply involved in acts of violence against one another and peace seemed at best a remote hope.  The idea of bringing children from both communities together for an extended period of time to learn from and about one another was thought to be a part of the solution to an old problem.  Professor Fred Lufkin has developed a number of practices and values that have their roots in these living experiences.  Forgiveness for Good is the book that has opened these ideas to all interested in a peaceful and focused life.

    One of the most helpful lessons stemming from the experience itself is detailed in the book. In a few words Prof Lufkin sets out the idea central to forgiving.  The experience that can set the stage for healing between and  among persons and groups begins in the forgiveness process itself.  The person or the group originating the forgiveness also finds that healing begins in their own lives.  If the forgiveness, the asking for pardon, is accepted then a parallel experience of healing can be felt mutually.  An experience of reconciliation can very well be the outcome of the process.  This is a worthwhile read.  I am fairly certain that the Bookstore carries the little work.

     In light of these ideas we can turn our attention to our own personal wars that provide the texture in human relations.  For many reasons and for most people and groups little wars can occupy our attention and are often accompanied by great suffering.  Asking for forgiveness is not easy.  After all, it means admitting a weakness and perhaps a frustration in having to admit we are less than perfect.  It is likely that admitting that one is less than perfect is doubly difficult in a place where perfection stands as the rule rather than the exception.  We are often reminded that we are the best.  A news flurry recently set out the various ways that Stanford has become the standard for “the best.”  It is harder to gain admission here, we are at the top of the list of successes in recruiting, athletics, fundraising and we are the dream destination school for the brightest and most gifted.  A Stanford degree at any level means jobs.  Could it be that even in this environment there are examples of the ordinary, the flawed?  Having to recognize our weaknesses as well as our strengths may be an option to discover true peace.

     The Scriptures and the Church remind us that in spite of our many gifts there are times when, as St Paul points out, we avoid what we should do and times when we do what we should not do.  It seems that there is a part of us wounded by something we cannot always understand or even describe.  But we also know that we must push on.  The better we understand ourselves and life around us the more clearly we realize that our lives are textured rather than smooth.  We win sometimes and we lose sometimes.   Getting things right may be our greatest challenge.

    When we accept the less than perfect people we are, the more we want to put things in order.  Alas, we cannot text or tweet or delete all that is out of place.  We require something tangible to help us pull the loose ends into place and to redirect our lives to get back on that road to perfection.  Just when the times are toughest, none less than Jesus enters stage left and  announces “... have I got a surprise for you!”  Jesus tells us that Forgiveness is for Good.  As we reach out to ask for forgiveness, for healing, the very process of healing begins.  To make it as simple and as accessible as possible we recall the Sacrament of Recollection.  (Good, old fashioned Confession)  We are given the opportunity to have a private and confidential conversation that has as its own an active holiness.  Reconciliation offers the chance to think with compassionate and prayerful guidance about our strengths and weaknesses.  What is more natural than sharing our deepest and most significant issues with another?

     As a priest I can testify that the most humbling experience in ministry is to be with another knowing that there is some mysterious presence as a partner to the discussion.  To realize that the community has given me the chance to speak words of healing that joins with the active work of Jesus, a chance to help an individual realize that she or he has access to the steps leading to peace and the good life, is overwhelming to learn.  It is such a joy that the staff of the CC@S will offer new options for this wonderful experience.  Consider taking advantage of this wonderful and holy gift on Sunday mornings as the Sacrament becomes available more often than the afternoons and evenings already available.  This experience can be a step on the road to happiness.

    Fr. Patrick LaBelle, O.P.